Godly Womanhood Starts Deeper Than What You See

Godly womanhood, biblical womanhood and Christian femininity are having a moment right now. Scroll through social media and you'll find plenty of influencers talking about what it looks like to be a godly woman.

And that's not necessarily a bad thing. My concern is when godly womanhood becomes something we perform, reduced to a particular set of behaviours rather than understood for what it actually is.

When we think about the characteristics of a godly woman, it's easy to start with what we can see. 

She's kind, wise, serves others and carries herself with grace. These are beautiful, biblical qualities, but they are also the fruit of something deeper, not simply behaviours to manufacture and perform well. 

There isn't a specific personality, lifestyle or aesthetic that makes a woman godly. Even Proverbs 31, perhaps the Bible's most familiar picture of a godly woman, ultimately brings our attention back to what sits underneath it all: 

"Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised." Proverbs 31:30.

And there you have it. That's the root of godliness, it begins with who we belong to, who has authority over our lives and, ultimately, what shapes the way we think and live.
So before we look at the characteristics of a godly woman, we need to look beneath the surface. Because when the root is being shaped by God, the fruit will eventually show.

 

What Is a Godly Woman? 

I was having a conversation with a friend recently and I said, if women truly understood what it meant to be a godly woman, I think more of us would fall in love with becoming one.

Because for some women, the idea of being a woman of God can feel restrictive or even intimidating. And perhaps part of the reason is that we've reduced it to behavioural modification or allowed cultural definitions of Christian femininity to shape our understanding of it.

At its foundation, a godly woman is a woman who belongs to God and is constantly being formed by Him. 

Her relationship with God is the root. Who she is becoming and how she lives are the fruit.

If you want to go deeper into what biblical womanhood actually means, read our blog, What Is Biblical Womanhood? The Truth Every Christian Woman Needs to Know.

Now we can look at the characteristics of a godly woman, because we understand the foundation they're meant to flow from.

 

3 Characteristics of a Godly Woman

So what are the characteristics then? Scripture shows us many of the qualities we would expect to see in her life: wisdom, humility, kindness, self-control, faithfulness, discernment and obedience to God, to name a few.

But as we've established, those characteristics don't appear from nowhere. So rather than simply giving you another list of qualities a godly woman should display, I want us to look at what produces them.

What is happening beneath the surface of a woman that produces wisdom, humility, confidence, self-control and the other characteristics we associate with godliness?

 

1. She fears the Lord

If there is one characteristic that sits above everything else, it is this: a godly woman fears the Lord.

Proverbs 31 describes a woman who is capable, wise, hardworking and skilled. She manages her household, makes sound decisions, conducts business and cares for others. Yet for all that she can do, Scripture doesn't point to her talent or ability as the thing that ultimately defines her.

It points to her godliness.

"A woman who fears the LORD is to be praised." Proverbs 31:30

The Hebrew word used for "fear" here carries the idea of reverence, awe and deep respect for God. This isn't a woman living frightened of Him. It's a woman who has come to know God, recognises who He is and gives Him His rightful place in her life.

And as Proverbs 9:10 reminds us, true wisdom starts when God is given His rightful place.

You can display all the outward characteristics we associate with a godly woman and still miss the very foundation of godliness: knowing, revering and submitting to God.

This is why the fear of the Lord isn't simply another characteristic on the list because it shapes the way a godly woman lives. When a woman truly reveres God, it changes her from the inside, and what is happening within eventually becomes visible in the way she lives.

 

2. She Knows Who She Is In Christ

When you know who you are in Christ, there's a different kind of confidence you carry. And this is not arrogance or self-importance, but a confidence that is both humble and secure because it’s not rooted in you.

John 1:12 tells us:

"But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God."

That's where her confidence comes from, knowing that I am a child of God, a daughter of the one who created the heavens and the earth, the one who has all authority and who has defeated the enemy and holds my life in His hands.

When that becomes more than something you know intellectually and becomes an identity you actually live from, it changes the way you carry yourself.

You don't need the approval of everyone around you to know your worth. You don't have to shrink because someone else is shining and (big AND), you can celebrate another woman without questioning what God has placed in you. 

And when you get it wrong, your identity doesn't collapse either. You can receive correction, repent and grow because your worth was never dependent on getting everything right.

This is what we begin to see in a woman who knows who she is in Christ;

She can be confident without being arrogant, humble without making herself small, and secure enough in who she is that she doesn't need to compare herself to everyone else.

 

3. She is shaped by God’s Word

One major characteristic of a godly woman is that she doesn't just know what the Bible says, she allows what it says to shape her, and she lives it out. . 

Romans 12:2 tells us to "be transformed by the renewing of your mind." And that's exactly what happens when we continually bring ourselves back to God's Word. It begins to change the way we think, and when the way we think changes, the way we live starts to change too.

Scripture shapes how she approaches her relationships, how she responds when she's offended, how she handles money, how she speaks, how she views success, how she navigates marriage and motherhood, and even how she responds when what God says is different from what she feels.

This is where we begin to see the characteristics we often associate with a godly woman show up in her everyday life.

She becomes more wise, because she's learning to make decisions according to God's Word. More discerning, because she knows the truth well enough to recognise what isn't. And that's particularly important when navigating cultural and political conversations, where, as Christian women, our character and convictions should be all the more visible. 

She's more gracious in her speech, because Scripture has something to say about the words she uses. More self-controlled, because she learns that every feeling doesn't have to become an action.

And I can assure you, that these are not characteristics that come easily to many of us, no matter how hard we try to perform them. 

They're the fruit of a mind and life that are continually being shaped by the Word of God.

The more His Word gets into us, the more it should eventually show up in how we live.

 

Go Deeper

Okay, so I know this may be a little different from what you were expecting to read from an article about the characteristics of a godly woman. You were probably expecting a list of behaviours that you could add to your how to be better list.

Be kinder, be more patient, speak better, be more disciplined, and yes, we love all of these.

Those behaviours matter, we should see the fruit of godliness in the way we live. But I'm here to challenge you to go deeper than behaviour.

Instead of only asking, "How can I act more like a godly woman?" start asking, "Am I allowing God to form me into one?" Because when the root is healthy, best believe the fruit will come.

So what do we actually do with all of this? Here are three places you can start::

Get to know God for yourself: Not simply through sermons, podcasts or even our blogs (although we love that you read them). Spend time in His presence, read His word and discover His character for yourself. The more you know Him, the more your reverence for Him grows.

Know who you are in Christ: Go back to what Scripture says about who you are because of Jesus, because of what He has done. Let your identity be established there before your roles, achievements, relationship status or the expectations of other people get to define you.

Let the Word do its work: Don't just read Scripture to finish a chapter or tick off a Bible plan, you’ve got to allow it to confront you, correct you and change the way you think. Then take what you've read and actually live it.

Godly womanhood is not about perfecting the appearance of a godly life, think of it as continually surrendering ourselves to God and allowing Him to shape the woman we're becoming.

Start with the root and guess what, the fruit will follow.